Where are the Asexual Voices C2E2 Presentation

As promised, here’s my presentation from C2E2 (all the thanks goes to Michi Trota of “Uncanny Magazine,” who was kind enough to record this for those of you who couldn’t be there. Thanks, Michi!).

This was one the scariest things I’ve done and I was so close to chickening out a couple times. But then I thought about how many ace artists there are out there, how many were in a situation to the one I was in just a few short years ago.

I have often written about my years in the closet, the number of toxic friendships I experienced, how I was made to believe I could never be an author because of my asexuality. This presentation was all about asexual artists and getting them the recognition they deserve, about showing that we do exist and we deserve to have control of our own narratives. A small part of it was also about myself, being the proud aro-ace feminist I have become. It was my way of saying “I love who I am, I’m proud of who I am, and I’m never going to let anyone take that from me ever again.”

Because asexuality is nothing to be ashamed of. Being asexual doesn’t mean you lack something, it’s just part of who you are. If anyone tells you differently tell them to fuck right off.

As I say in the description for this blog: “Asexuals deserve to be seen and heard.” And that is something I will always, always fight for 🙂

Signal Boost: Embraceable

Hello all!

This is a bit of a personal signal boost, so I apologize if I’m all over the place. I’m just ridiculously excited.

Shortly after I started Asexual Artists, I was contacted by August McLaughlin. August is the host of the radio program “Girl Boner Radio” (available on iTunes) for a segment she was doing on asexuality. She had found me on Twitter and wanted to know if she could interview me. I must admit, I was more than a little nervous: the sex positivity movement has often been rather indifferent towards the asexual community, occasionally even hostile. However, August was quite reassuring and I was impressed with her. So I agreed.

To date, it was one of the most pleasant and respectful interviews I’ve ever had the pleasure to participate in. August did her homework, didn’t ask any dehumanizing questions, and was the most professional and friendly interviewer. I walked away from the interview feeling empowered and I hoped that I had been a worthwhile interviewee.

Shortly after that wonderful interview experience, August approached me again and asked if I would be interested in contributing an essay to a book she was putting together about women’s sexuality. I was absolutely stunned and it took me maybe half a second to accept the offer.

I hadn’t really thought about how difficult the essay would be to write. I had to revisit a rather painful time in my life, what I frequently refer to as my “closet days.” However, I knew it was important that I do so. I finished the essay and sent it to August, who has done an absolutely phenomenal job with this book.

Embraceable was released on Kindle last Sunday (it will probably come out in paperback in early January). You can get a copy here. I realize that I’m quite biased, but it is truly an awesome book.

Let me tell you why this is really incredible: it is extremely rare for an openly asexual woman to be included in any kind of feminist anthology, let alone one concerning sex positivity. Guys, that’s super awesome!

I will forever be grateful to August for this opportunity. She’s exactly what a good ally looks like: she used her platform to highlight asexual voices, rather than talk over them. I am continually impressed with her own activism (Girl Boner is quite an interesting show, which covers a variety of subjects). She has done a spectacular job putting this book together and deserves a standing ovation for it. You can find out more about August and her own work on her personal website: https://augustmclaughlin.wordpress.com/

I hope some of you will check out the book. If you’re wondering how I got my start or why I created Asexual Artists, the story is in Embraceable.

Thank you.

Embraceable cover