Sorry and an Update

Hi all!

I know I’ve been super inactive for a while. I’m going to explain part of the reason why.

I went to the art show in Vancouver in April. It went really well. We had a lot of great submissions and showed some beautiful art.

Me subtly being Lady Loki at an academic event

I thought the panel on writing was also really well put together. Everyone was very nice and I was super happy with how it went overall.

Then I got home and the university started trying to back out of paying me for my flight home (something that was agreed upon beforehand). I still have yet to be reimbursed for my flight home and it was not cheap. It was the cheapest I could get and it still cost a lot of money.

Because I don’t know when or if they’re going to reimburse me (like they said they would), and because I have to start traveling to more cons to sell my own series, I’ve had to get a side hustle to off-set the costs of travel. I like my job, it’s a good albeit challenging part-time gig, but it frequently leaves me feeling tired. I’m still adjusting to it.

The reason why this has affected my work on Asexual Artists: I’m just tired, people. I’m worn out and I feel so used. I know I mentioned I was struggling with feeling burned out in an earlier post. This situation has just pretty much just doused whatever embers I had managed to reignite during the weeks I took off. I put a lot of time into this art show, time and emotional energy, and I feel like the university took advantage of that. I hate saying that because again, the people I met were incredibly nice. I got to meet a friend from online for the first time ever and that was thrilling.

I don’t often cry, but this actually made me cry. Because they didn’t just take advantage of my time, they took advantage of me monetarily. I feel so damn stupid for not asking for the travel costs up front. I should have done that (if I ever do something even remotely like this again, I will definitely learn from that mistake). I’m hurt and angry, but mostly I’m just tired.

I have interviews that need to be uploaded and scheduled and I’m going to do that, but I really need to take the month of June off. I really need some time for myself, to do the things I enjoy doing, to let loose and unwind a bit. I need to put work into my own projects.

I hate saying that because I know how important this site is to people, but I’m a human being. I can be hurt and I need breaks too. I love this site and I love that people get so much from it (I hate that there are people who take advantage of it and of me, but I know they’re a very small minority).

I’m going to try my best to dredge up the energy to upload and schedule the small batch of interviews that have been sitting in my inbox for months now. I’m really trying my best, people.

Again, I’m going to be taking the month of June off. However, I will still respond to any emails that are sent to me (so keep sending interview requests, please).

If you’re interested in my travels during June (or just want to keep up with me, I will be posting pictures on my Instagram (laurenjankowski27) and Twitter (lauren_jankowsk).

Thanks, everybody! I hope to bounce back soon 🙂

Exciting Announcement

Hello everybody!

Interviews shall resume next week (and I still need more, so please keep sending those interview requests!).

Today I have an exciting announcement about an upcoming appearance.

Yours truly is going to be in Artist Alley at Ace Comic Con with my series The Shape Shifter Chronicles! I’m super excited about this show because it’s freaking massive. I love meeting readers and fellow aces at these shows. And I’m also going to be table neighbors with a fellow ace artist, who was actually featured on this site a while back (Hallopino: Tumblr & WordPress).

Here’s the message that was sent with this shiny social media badge: “I am thrilled to announce I will be appearing at @acecomiccon Midwest at Chicago’s Navy Pier October 12-14th alongside Tom Hiddleston, Josh Brolin, & many more for an amazing weekend! Want to join us? Get your tix here: http://ow.ly/uqjO30l7DOf #acecomiccon”

It’s going to be a great show.

If you’re planning on attending, please drop by Artist Alley and say hi!

Thanks, everybody!

ADDENDUM: Ace Comic Con has nothing to do with asexuality. Rather that’s more a hilarious coincidence :-p

The Passing of a Good Friend

(Cross-posted from Tumblr)

Hello all.

I am so sorry to do this (I try not to post anything personal or signal boosts on days when an interview is scheduled). I just found out that a friend of mine, who I knew since childhood, recently passed away. To say that I am devastated doesn’t really even begin to describe it. I feel like I’ve been punched in the chest. It feels like a bright light in my world has just been extinguished.

His name was Billy and he always had a smile on his face. He was the first (and for a time, the only) person I told when I was assaulted in 8th grade. Billy was angry on my behalf, saying that I should bring charges and writing down possible ones I could file for. It never came to pass, obviously, but the fact that someone was so outraged on my behalf, it was one of the most moving experiences in my life. It made me feel like I actually mattered. And … it is what made me decide to always be kind. If I could, I must always treat people with kindness.

That personal motto is eventually what became the driving principle of Asexual Artists: always treat people with kindness. The principle that I observe to this day (and one of the many reasons this site continues).

Over the years, Billy and I fell out of touch. It’s an unfortunate fact of life, when you go away to college or wherever, you lose touch with people. The last time I saw him, he surprised me at the very first reading I ever gave. I was nervous, shaking like a leaf, and here comes Billy with the brightest smile you could imagine. And we chatted and laughed and suddenly, the prospect of reading aloud wasn’t so terrifying anymore.

Had I known that would be the last time we would see each other, I would have spoken to him longer. I would have told him how much his friendship meant to me. I would have done … something different.

Today, I’m wearing mostly black. Except with splashes of color. I’m wearing my “Feminist as Fuck” shirt in honor of Billy being the one who showed me it was okay to be angry, to demand my rights, to be brave even when completely fucking terrified. And my socks are rainbow dogs, because my friend was queer and a fellow dog lover.

Followers and artists, I am asking a favor: if you enjoy (or have ever enjoyed this site), if it means anything to you or has made you feel less alone, or moved you or taught you anything at any time, I ask that you raise a glass and spare a kind thought for my friend, Billy. May he rest in peace in a garden that always blooms.

Originally posted by erebussociety

Personal Signal Boost

Hello all!

I hope you won’t mind a small personal signal boost.

I have been working so, so hard on my fifth novel and the release date is fast approaching (I seriously can’t believe it).

As part of the release, there’s going to be a cover reveal happening on the 28th and I would love it if some of you were able to help me reveal the cover. That would be such a great start to 2017!

Here’s what was written on the Snowy Wings Facebook page: Help reveal the cover of Lauren Jankowski‘s newest fantasy novel, THE DWELLING OF EKHIDNA, coming in January! Learn more about the book and sign up for the reveal here: https://goo.gl/forms/dfke77F1zQ0WfKdA2

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As I mentioned before, I’m now publishing with Snowy Wings Publishing. It’s a new group and it promises to be simply amazing.

As part of their launch, they’re putting together a Street Team to help get the word out about our upcoming releases. It’s a great opportunity to get behind the scenes looks and special goodies, perfect if you’re a book fanatic.

From their Facebook page: Did you hear? We opened doors to our brand new Street Team, The Snow Angels!

Join us at http://streetteam.snowywingspublishing.com

Get ARCs, direct access to the authors, first looks, behind the scenes, exclusive stories and content, events, games, challenges, AND the ability to earn feathers for your wings which you can redeem as prizes (small things all the way up to big things like signed books) Trust us, you don’t want to miss you!

If you’re a book lover, trust me, this is for you 🙂

Thank you, everybody!

A Short New Year’s Eve Post

Hello all!

We’ve reached the end of 2016 and I find that I’m feeling rather reflective. It has been a rough year, but this site is still going (it will be three years old on January 15th). It will still be going next year and the year after that and the one after that and so on and so forth.

Some time ago, I was asked if I ever regretted coming out as asexual. Was it worth being threatened, mocked, rejected by half my family (some of whom have threatened and bullied me)? And, I didn’t even have to think about my answer: Yes. Yes, it was worth it. Yes, it will always be worth it.

Because by embracing my asexuality, I freed myself. By finding a way to take pride in my identity, I broke out of the toxicity that surrounded me and I found that I was not alone in the world. I found love and hope.

This site is difficult to run and requires an enormous amount of time, but I do so because when I read through the interviews, when I look at the amazing and unique images, I’m reminded of just how much beauty there is in the world. Some work has made me smile or laugh, some work has brought me to tears or moved me. I feel lucky to be able to speak to so many of you and am humbled by your courage.

There is so much beauty and love and kindness out there. Even in the darkest of times, even when everything seems so wrong, even when there is doubt and fear, people continue creating and filling it with beautiful things. People continue to love and smile and laugh.

And that gives me hope.

Things will likely be tough for a while, but this site will continue on. And it will remind asexual artists that we’re capable of so much. Our voices may be silenced. We may be ignored, forgotten, pushed aside, bullied, talked over, scorned, mocked. But one day we won’t be.

One day, asexuality will be accepted and embraced. Future generations will see themselves reflected in books and media. One day, asexuality won’t just be an afterthought. One day, asexuals won’t have to go through a period of feeling broken or freakish. They will be able to embrace who they are and find their community. And they’ll always be able to find this site and marvel at just how amazing fellow aces truly are. They’ll find new worlds that we have created, filled with heroes who are like them. They’ll read the words of ace artists that came before them and feel a sense of pride.

That is truly an amazing thought.

Whatever happens in the coming years, just remember that there will always be love and hope and laughter and joy. Be proud of who you are. And always remember that myself and this site shall always be right here to help feature some of that beauty.

Happy New Year’s and thank you 🙂 ❤